If you’ve spent any time around someone in recovery, then you may have heard him or her talking about “sober anniversaries”. And maybe you’ve asked yourself why sober anniversaries are significant, or why people would celebrate sober anniversaries in the first place?
Well, all your questions about sober anniversaries are going to be answered. In particular, you’ll find out:
- What is a sober anniversary?
- How do you choose a sober anniversary?
- Why are sober anniversaries important?
- How do you celebrate your sober anniversary?
What is a Sober Anniversary?
There are a lot of anniversaries that we celebrate. For instance, couples have anniversaries for when they first started dating or got married. Business owners have anniversaries each year to commemorate the first day they opened their businesses. We even recognize a number of holidays that, in one way or another, honor certain anniversaries, like Independence Day (i.e. the anniversary of the United States declaring its independence) and Martin Luthor King, Jr. Day (i.e. the anniversary of King’s birthday).
So you can probably guess what a sober anniversary might be. Basically, it’s one particular day each year that commemorates the start of someone’s recovery. In many circles, sober anniversaries — also commonly called sobriety anniversaries and sober birthdays — are as important as actual birthdays, or potentially even more so.
Choosing Your Sober Anniversary
People often debate about which specific day constitutes a sober anniversary. Is it the date of your last drink of alcohol or drug use? Is it the date of the intervention when the addicted person agreed to get help? Is it the first day (or last day) of addiction treatment? Is it the first day after the most recent relapse?
Before your head starts spinning, keep in mind that there’s no right or wrong answer here. After all, the anniversary that makes sense to one person may not make as much sense to you or to your loved one. At some point, each person in recovery has to look back and decide which step of the recovery journey was the true beginning of his or her sobriety.
The Importance of Sober Anniversaries
To understand the importance of a sober anniversary, you really need to understand the significance of recovery. There’s a tendency to look at recovery as simply being a person’s decision to stop drinking or using drugs (which, in and of itself, is actually much more difficult and more significant than many people think). However, you have to remember that when someone suffers from addiction, that person lives in the throes of that disease for a long time, sometimes even decades.
By extension, many maladaptive behaviors and dangerous habits are learned during that period. So recovery isn’t just about putting down the drugs or alcohol. Rather, it’s the start of an entirely new lifestyle and way of thinking. But it takes a ton of effort, not to mention conviction, to achieve. And even then, recovery never fully ends. Staying sober takes continuous dedication and an awareness of one’s needs.
Sober anniversaries are important and worth celebrating for two main reasons: First, sober anniversaries are a celebration of the start of recovery, which is essential when someone realized that continued use of drugs or alcohol would inevitably result in death. Secondly, sober anniversaries are important because each anniversary marks another year of staying sober.
Aside from those two very important reasons, we celebrate sober anniversaries because doing so keeps us humble. Virtually no one achieves or sustains sobriety without the help of others, so sober anniversaries are as much about appreciating those who contributed to the person’s recovery as it is about celebrating his or her efforts. Sober anniversaries aren’t a celebration of success, but, rather, a way to recognize hard work and the selflessness of others.
How to Celebrate Your Sober Anniversary
Obviously, champagne toasts aren’t the most appropriate way to celebrate a sober anniversary. But omitting drugs and alcohol from the festivities doesn’t have to make celebrating a sober anniversary any less fun or special. In fact, there are plenty of great ways to celebrate sobriety anniversaries and sober birthdays. Here are just a few.
Host a Rehab Reunion
Whether it was inpatient or outpatient treatment, most people who go to rehab make friends (or at least acquaintances) who shared in the experience. Even if they may not become best friends by the end of the program, there’s something about the shared intensity of rehabilitation that creates a bond and sense of deep understanding between people. Plus, there’s a good chance that the people who completed the same program would have the same — or similar — sober anniversaries.
So a rehab reunion is a pretty straightforward way to celebrate everyone’s success in recovery. It’s also a chance to catch-up with friends and acquaintances from rehab. After all, there’s a reason recovery fellowships, twelve-step programs, and other support groups work: Nobody is alone in their success or their failures. Plus, it just feels good to be able to share your successes with people who are most likely to either share or appreciate them.
Have Dinner at a Fabulous Restaurant
Admit it — there’s a fancy restaurant that you’ve been dying to try for months, maybe even years. Well, what could possibly be a better justification for a culinary splurge than celebrating the anniversary of your new life?
This is a somewhat conventional way to celebrate a sobriety anniversary. But that doesn’t make it any less effective or appropriate. Celebrating at a great restaurant over delectable (and, of course, Insta-worthy) meals will never go out of style. At the end of the day, it’s an opportunity to show how far you have come in recovery.
Plus, making new memories like this is a great way to overwrite your loved ones’ memories of the old you.
Invite Family and Friends for a Mocktail Party
There’s definitely something symbolic about coming together to have mocktails as a way of celebrating a sober anniversary. It’s like rendering alcohol — a substance that claims 88,000 lives every year — powerless. Needless to say, this is quite empowering, even if you’d been addicted to drugs rather than alcohol. Like holding up a sign to your past that says, “Now who’s in control?”
But beyond being an allegory for success in recovery, you can get creative and really make a mocktail party fun. Make it a BYOM (“Bring Your Own Mixer”) party to encourage attendees to find and bring unique mocktail recipes. Set up a karaoke machine to turn your living room into an impromptu sober karaoke bar. Play sober-themed party games, like trying to apply lipstick or make a sandwich while blindfolded.
Treat Yourself to Something Special
Maybe you’re not the most social person. Or perhaps you’re not a “foodie” and don’t see much value in paying for overpriced meals. Whatever the case, another way to celebrate a sober birthday is to buy yourself something special or something you’ve been eyeing for a while. It doesn’t necessarily have to be something that’s directly related to recovery.
The idea is that whenever you use or see what you purchased, you’ll think about all the effort put into your sobriety and the amount of time you’ve been sober.
Save the [Recovery] Date with Sea Change Recovery
A sober anniversary can be equally important — or potentially more important — as birthdays, wedding anniversaries, and other annual celebrations. After all, getting sober is one of the most profoundly transformative processes a person can experience.
Sea Change Recovery offers flexible, comprehensive treatment options that deliver real results. By completing one of our Sea Change rehab programs, our patients begin their journey of recovery and many sober anniversaries.
To learn more about how Sea Change Recovery can help, contact us today. Or if you’re not ready to begin a treatment program, check out the Sea Change Blog for weekly posts about addiction, treatment programs, and the recovery lifestyle.